As I write this, it is December 7th.
Lord-willing, in exactly one month I will be boarding a plane, and my journey to Malaysia will begin. After about 32 hours of travel time and changing planes in 3 different places I will arrive in Penang with a fresh start at the beginning of a brand new year.
I wonder when reality will set in. How long will it take me to realize that this is actually real? I’m actually moving to Malaysia.
This season of waiting and preparing and anticipating is almost over. The day when it will come to pass will be here soon.
I guess December a month that is all about preparation and anticipation and waiting. Christmas is almost here. Trees are being decorated, presents are getting wrapped, goodies are baking in thousands of ovens and travel plans are being made for the big day.
Parents are making lots of preparations. Kids are doing LOTS of waiting and anticipating.
We never know exactly what the day will hold, but we all hope for a special day with memories that will warm our hearts for years to come. There’s usually a few lovely surprises tucked into the day as well.
It makes me think of Mary waiting on little baby Jesus to come and pondering the angel’s words that had been spoken to her so long before:
“He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High.” Luke 1:32a
Like Mary, when God speaks to us and we respond with a heart of obedience and love we don’t truly and fully know what’s ahead. A lot of times we think we do, but I’ve come to find out that I really don’t.
I think the important thing is that when we trust the One who speaks we can respond in full confidence knowing that He is faithful and good and that it’s all going to work out – even if it doesn’t fit into our nice little box of expectations.
During these times we make preparations. We wait and we anticipate the things to come.
Right now I feel like I still have a million things to do to logistically prepare for this move, for this new chapter of life.
I’m anticipating that God’s going to come through. If He’s really called me to do this thing then He’ll provide for me.
In the plan-making and praying and seeking there’s also the waiting.
Realistically, I still need about half of my funds to come in in the next 2 weeks.
My flesh threatens to take me over with anxiety and fear and push me to strive to make it happen in my flesh, by my own doings.
Then there’s His Spirit within me gently calling me to trust and continue to be faithful to Him. He reminds me that He is outside of time. He speaks to me of His promises and His love for me and His ability to do the impossible. He calls me to abide in Him
This tension is refining me. It’s calling me into deeper intimacy with Him on a level that I’ve never experienced. It’s showing me more of my dirty flesh and sin and also so much more of His grace, mercy and love for me.
It’ll be interesting to see what happens in the next couple of weeks as I continue to prepare, anticipate and wait.
I want to thank you for being a part of my journey, for reading and praying and sticking with me even though these past couple of years have been a bit crazy!
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Together we can change world.
Jessica Robbins 